100 Albums With Occasional Commentary

I just received my latest copy of Spin magazine, with its countdown of the best 100 albums of the last 20 years. I don't own every single one, but like any good blogger, I'm not gonna let something like an informed opinion get in the way of my blowhardiness. And away we go:

1. Radiohead - OK Computer: Great great great album. I thoroughly agree with its placement at the top. This is what I call a "litmus test album"; someone who says it was boring or too cerebral or too electronic is probably a bore and not worth your time. Go make a new friend with better taste.
2. Public Enemy - It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back: Good, but I liked "Fear of a Black Planet" better.
3. Nirvana - Nevermind: Breed was the heaviest shit I'd ever heard. If Radiohead had broken up after "The Bends", this would have been numero uno.
4. Pavement - Slanted and Enchanted: Never listened to it, and never really got the whole Pavement thing. My brother worships them. I think it helps if you're in college.
5. The Smiths - The Queen is Dead: Morrissey is my favorite singer who I think I could probably take in a fight.
6. Pixies - Surfer Rosa: I'm just starting to get into them. It's weird stuff, but not exactly egghead-y. I like it.
7. De La Soul - 3 Feet High and Rising: This album, unfortunately, came out at a time when I honestly couldn't stand hip-hop. So I know nothing about this album, except that "Me Myself and I" had a great sample.
8. Prince - Sign 'o' the Times: He may be batshit loony, but he is the Man. I play "I Could Never Take the Place of Your Man" a lot on my iPod.
9. PJ Harvey - Rid of Me: I saw her live five years ago and she opened with "Rid of Me". Amazing song. I don't own this. I probably should.
10. N.W.A. - Straight Outta Compton: This came out during my aforementioned anti-rap period, but all the same I still thought this was The Shit. The title song is one of the best rap songs ever written, period.
11. U2 - Achtung Baby: Every song on this album is great. I vacillate between whether I like this more than "Joshua Tree"; my fave's usually whichever I heard last.
12. Beastie Boys - Paul's Boutique: This album is a work of art. Who knew the guys who wrote "Girls" had this in 'em? This is one of those great hip-hop albums no one can make anymore because of sampling laws.
13. Husker Du - New Day Rising
14. Sonic Youth - Daydream Nation
15. Liz Phair - Exile in Guyville: I cry foul. I can't stand Liz Phair. Totally overrated, and what little artistic gravitas she had was thrown out the window the minute she hired the motherfucking Matrix.
16. Beck - Odelay: I cherish it deeply.
17. Nas - Illmatic
18. Guns n' Roses - Appetite for Destruction: This is the metal album it was okay for non-metalheads to like. Axl may be a douchebag but nobody screams like he screamed on "Paradise City".
19. Hole - Live Through This: Courtney Love downplays Kurt Cobain having had something to do with the writing of this album. Courtney Love never wrote another album even a fraction as good as this. I'll let you do the math.
20. Wu-Tang Clan - Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Chambers): Can you love a band regardless of their music? I dig the Wu as individuals (esp. the RZA), but I find their music kinda forgettable.
21. Public Enemy - Fear of a Black Planet: See #2. I didn't even care about their supposed anti-semitism. This was just awesome.
22. My Bloody Valentine - Loveless: This is one of those bands/albums every rock star loves and credits with being a huge influence, but no one outside of the production of rock music or rock journalism has ever heard of. I dare you to name one of their songs.
23. Outkast - Stankonia: These guys are impossible not to like.
24. Sleater-Kinney - Dig Me Out: See #22 above.
25. Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral: Trent Reznor was never better. I personally think he should have hung it up after this and retreated to a crypt somewhere, emerging only occasionally to do soundtrack work and drink the sweet blood of the innocent.
26. Bjork - Post: "Hyperballad" is a superb song.
27. The Cure - The Head on the Door: I hated the Cure, by and large, while they were putting out their best material. Now I really like them. I'm complex and stuff.
28. Oasis - Definitely Maybe: Hey man, I ain't gonna apologize: I liked "Supersonic" and "Live Forever". I still do. It's not my fault they continued beating us over the head with their Beatles obsession for the next 10 years.
29. Fugazi - 13 Songs: See #22 again. This is what happens when rock critics write countdowns.
30. The Notorious B.I.G. - Ready to Die: Ugh. Don't understand why he was so popular. Biggie's delivery sucked.
31. Dinosaur Jr. - You're Living All Over Me
32. The Replacements - Tim: "Bastards of Young" was one of the great songs of the 80's, and certainly one of the great videos too. And "Here Comes a Regular" is one of my fave sad drunk songs. Why oh why can't they reunite?
33. Ice Cube - AmeriKKKa's Most Wanted: "Hi, I'm Ice Cube. I used to rap about shooting cops with an AK. Now I make family comedies and PG-13 action movies. You know what they say: if you can't beat 'em..."
34. Elliott Smith - Either/Or
35. Dr. Dre - The Chronic: We have Dre to thank for Snoop. Thanks Dre! Unfortunately, we also have him to thank for fucking Eminem. Thanks a lot, Dre.
36. Pixies - Doolittle
37. Guided By Voices - Bee Thousand: Another critic's darling.
38. A Tribe Called Quest - The Low End Theory
39. Lucinda Williams - Lucinda Williams: Yawn. Isn't this getting dull?
40. Run-D.M.C. - Raising Hell - I love their songs, but somehow I think they spawned rap-rock bands like Limp Bizkit. Someday they'll have to answer for that.
41. Smashing Pumpkins - Siamese Dream: Ahhh. Listening to this album makes me feel 16 again.
42. Jane's Addiction - Nothing's Shocking
43. Boogie Down Productions - Criminal Minded
44. Green Day - Dookie: I said it in 1994 and I'll say it again now: You may hate this album (I do) but it's gonna keep making these countdown lists for a long time to come.
45. Kanye West - College Dropout
46. The Fall - This Nation's Saving Grace: Never heard of 'em. Bet you haven't either.
47. Eric B. & Rakim - Paid in Full
48. Radiohead - Kid A: There's two or three classic songs on here. It's only like my third or fourth favorite Radiohead album, but there you go. Still better than most everyone else's best. That said: where the hell's "The Bends" in this bitch? That album's only about five times better than "Kid A".
49. Lauryn Hill - The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill: Everything written about this album in the last 5 years or so in a music magazine has had to mention, somewhere in the body of the text, that Lauryn Hill has vanished from the pop scene. Lemme check my copy of Spin...yup, there it is at the bottom. Guess what, rock critic guys? I think you're the only ones left who care.
50. New Order - Low-Life: I'd like this sound a whole lot more if it weren't currently spawning a generation of really dismal acts like Interpol.
51. Nirvana - In Utero: Go listen to the drums on "Radio Friendly Unit Shifter". I'll wait.
...
...
...
Didn't that fucking kill?!?!?
52. Beastie Boys - Licensed to Ill: I dare you to listen to "Paul Revere" and not sing along. Can't be done.
53. Rage Against the Machine - The Battle of Los Angeles: Talk about going out on top.
54. The Breeders - Last Splash: Huh? "Cannonball" was a fun song and all, but would this album be here if it didn't have the Pixies' Kim Deal fronting it?
55. The Chemical Brothers - Dig Your Own Hole: I'm gonna say it right now: I knew this whole electronica thing was gonna crash and burn.
56. PJ Harvey - To Bring You My Love
57. The White Stripes - White Blood Cells: Great album, but "Elephant" was better by a country mile.
58. Metallica - Master of Puppets: Yeah, I owned it. Don't judge me. Do you remember what the popular music scene was like before "Smells Like Teen Spirit" came out? This was quality. I may hate today's Metallica, but I'll still drink to 1986's Metallica.
59. Modest Mouse - The Lonesome Crowded West
60. De La Soul - De La Soul Is Dead
61. Weezer - Pinkerton: Oh sure, now they like it.
62. Missy Elliott - Supa Dupa Fly: Whatever.
63. Pavement - Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain: "Cut Your Hair" was a fun song. But Beavis and Butthead making fun of it? That was quality.
64. Eminem - The Marshall Mathers LP: Ugh.
65. Basement Jaxx - Remedy: Another one you've never heard of.
66. Outkast - Aquemini
67. Slayer - Reign in Blood: Did you know you can summon Slayer just by screaming their name at a concert? Any concert. Go to a Phil Collins show and you can make the diminuitive Genesis frontman morph into a screaming banshee of death, just by yelling "SLAYER!!!" and putting up the two-finger devil salute. This concludes the government-mandated educational portion of this website.
68-80 - A bunch of crap you've never heard of unless you happen to be a college radio DJ, like Le Tigre and Belle and Sebastian.
81. Beck - Mellow Gold: This album had "One-Hit-Wonder" written all over it. If you knew he was gonna be BECK one day, you're probably also one of those people who knew Bruce Willis was a ghost 10 minutes into "The Sixth Sense". In other words, a lying asshole.
82. Jeff Buckley - Grace: Famous 'cause he's dead.
83. At The Drive In - Relationship of Command: Only thing I'd ever heard of theirs was "One-Armed Scissors". Thought it rocked, but they lose mucho points for spawning The Mars Volta.
84. Soundgarden - Superunknown: I liked Soundgarden. I liked Rage Against the Machine. So why am I so bored by Audioslave?
85. R.E.M. - Automatic for the People: R.E.M. is not too-appropriate name for a band that mostly puts me to sleep. Has a song ever sucked as much as "Everybody Hurts"?
86. Meat Puppets - Up on the Sun
87. Blur - Parklife
88. Stereolab - Emperor Tomato Ketchup
89. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Fever to Tell: "Maps" is the love song of our time.
90. Sonic Youth - Sister: Okay, I'm just gonna come right out and say it: the only people who really love Sonic Youth are rock journalists. No one else gives a shit.
91. XTC - Skylarking: I remember really liking "Dear God" when I was a kid. I heard it again a couple of weeks ago, and it struck me as overly earnest and kinda dippy.
92. Big Black - Atomizer: I know, I know. "Who?" Steve Albini's band. "Who?" Guy who produced "In Utero", among other albums. "Who?" Umm, can't help you anymore.
93. Pearl Jam - Ten: Mmm, "Black". Mmm, "Porch". "Evenflow"? I'm regurgitating that one.
94. Slint - Spiderland: Nothing to do with Spiderman. I checked.
95. Elastica - Elastica: I remember this band sounded extremely English. You know how some Brit vocalists kinda sound American, and then later you find out they're really English? You'll never make that mistake with Elastica's lead singer. I also recall that she used to date Damon Albarn from Blur. I also also recall that Elastica used to suck horribly.
96. The Pogues - Rum, Sodomy & the Lash: Shane MacGowan's teeth make me wanna floss for about 12 hours straight.
97. Neutral Milk Hotel - In the Aeroplane Over the Sea: I know nothing about this album or band, but if I ever start a Dungeons and Dragons-themed band, I'm totally gonna call it Neutral Evil Hotel.
98. Cornershop - When I Was Born for the 7th Time: I hated that "Brimful of Asha" song. A lot. Am I to understand Spin picked this over OK Fucking Computer for best album of '97? Are you kidding me? Real forward-looking, Spin. I bet this made the countdown just so they could save face.
99. Afghan Whigs - Gentlemen
100. The Strokes - Is This It: Is that it? No "The Bends", no "Angel Dust", no "Elephant"? "Funeral" by the Arcade Fire relegated to some sidebar ghetto for albums that may make the cut in another 20 years? Horse droppings. That said, I loved "Is This It". Unimpeachable. Hell, I'd have put it higher than 100.